Finding the rhythm of intimacy with Alysha Malik founder of Rythm

The thought of intimacy can be intimidating and it can be hard to know where to begin.

Alysha Malik launched Rythm in 2023 with a mission to help humans connect better with their parts and partners through safer intimacy essentials.

Alysha's curiosity around relationships and intimacy led her to join sexual wellness brand, Dame Products, where she led product innovation. It was during her time at Dame that the seeds for Rythm were planted.

Through product-testing and benchmarking intimacy products, Alysha was surprised to discover how many products contained bad-for-her ingredients that didn't bring pleasure to her intimate life and body. This led her to create Rythm, a trusted destination to discover, shop, and learn about safer intimacy essentials.

In our Q+A, we discuss Rythm and maintaining your relationship with yourself to achieve true intimacy.

Q. How Does Rythm Work?

A. Think of Rythm as a platform that hosts many brands under one roof. However, unlike other platforms, we work with our Clinical Board of Doctors, Sexual Medicine Nurse Practitioners, a Naturopathic Doctor, and a Sex Therapist to make sure all of our products are viewed from the lens of the vagina and are vaginal safe, non-toxic/clean, and effective.

We offer natural solutions to what we believe are natural problems. Our product assortment is a mixture of a sex store and a vaginal apothecary and we sell everything from supplements, to topicals, and vibrators that target the symptoms that get in the way of female pleasure. This includes solutions for bad communication, stress, anxiety, bloating, PMS, mood, low libido, vaginal dryness as well as male ED. 

Q. Why is connection to self pivotal in partnered relationships?

A. Oftentimes we tend to lose ourselves in relationships or when we find a partner. But the identity of the “self” is so important to maintain intimacy. It is when we engage in the things that we love, light us up, and give us passion that we are able to vibrate on a higher frequency that makes us more attractive to others.

Declaring and maintaining your independence within a relationship is critical for curiosity to thrive. When curiosity thrives, it helps build intimacy and desire. 

Q. What are some ways we can deeper connect to ourselves?

A. Understanding your energy levels and output is super important when it comes to connecting with yourself.  

Pay close attention to the thoughts that don’t serve you as well as how your body responds to various tasks where you feel expansive vs contractive and try to incorporate the ones where you feel an excitement in your stomach or get lost in a state of flow, weekly into your schedule.

This could look like a gym class, reading, dancing, hosting an event, gardening, painting, laughing with a friend, farting, you name it. I also highly encourage journaling as an everyday or weekly practice.

Q. What are some ways we can deepen connection with our partners?

A. Connection doesn’t necessarily need to take up hours of your time, leaving one partner still craving more and feeling unsatisfied on an intimate level.

There are five types of intimacy: emotional, physical, intellectual, spiritual, and experiential. Depending on where you are in the intimacy wheel, you can assess what you want more of or less of in your life. 

However, for those craving emotional intimacy, Rythm has developed a four step intimacy framework to help partners connect deeper. It only takes 10 mins and reaps benefits:

Step 1 - Attention: Carve out 10 minutes at the end of the day to put your phones away and sit down with each other, staring into each other’s eyes. Eye-gazing is super important here — you want to feel seen and be seen. 

Step 2 - Physical Touch: Perform an act of touch (hold hands, cuddle, hug, sitting in their lap) while this check-in takes place. 

Step 3 - Words of Affirmation: Give your partner a compliment. Anything from how nice they look to what you value or like about them. Ex: "Honey, thanks for making breakfast this morning." "You smell so good." "I love it when you wear that shirt."

Step 4 - Be Vulnerable: Share something that happened in your day with your partner and how it made you feel. Examples include what is stressing you out at work, or an experience that activated a strong emotional response within you from love to fear. This helps foster feelings of closeness.  

Another way to build up intimacy is through our In Tune, our card game for couples, developed by Therapists to help you connect better. For more tips on intimacy, you can follow @rythmwellness on Instagram.